We All Stand Together – #ISUPPORTYOU

Now I haven’t blogged in a while (I hope you noticed) and this was just the kind of thing I needed to be part of to get off my ass to blog again.  November 1st  – 7th 2014 is the inaugural week of the #ISUPPORTYOU Movement started by Suzanne Barston of Fearless Formula Feeder and ISY partner, Kim Simon, of Mama By The Bay

I have a real passion for mom to mom support, especially for new moms and the increased pressure to breastfeed. (And get it right)

See I was one of those mom’s that sat in the prenatal classes being told how everyone could breastfeed, and yes it might be tough but it will get easier. My husband and I made our minds up that it was the ONLY way to go. I was waaayyyy up there on my little pedestal looking down on the formula feeding mom’s convinced they had not tried hard enough or that they should be making more of an effort. My mom has a saying “Oh how the mighty have fallen”. I didn’t just fall off that judgemental pedestal I was perch on, I came crashing down, hit every-single-obstacle and was finally crushed by the chair.

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See my plan didn’t include 36 hours of induced labour followed by an emergency C-section. It also didn’t include the PPD I suffered and the fussy baby.

I can close my eyes and see my husband and I in the hospital desperately trying to get mini me latched on and her crying because she was hungry. A young nurse came in and offered me formula. Her kind eyes pleading for me to check my ego and feed my child. I didn’t see it that way.

“I was a formula fed baby,” she told me. “It doesn’t mean I would have been a doctor if I was breast fed.”

I heard her words but was still fogged up in my own world of how and what I should be doing. (The start of endless mama guilt)

So we finger fed her the formula to avoid potential nipple confusion so she would eat.

The next nurse was equally as kind with her advice and told me should she have another baby she would go straight to formula to save herself. Still. I persisted. What did these bitches know right?

So she taught me how to tube feed from the breast and advised me to get a breast pump.

Once I got home the wheels fell off. It was exhausting trying to breastfeed a baby with a tube taped to my breast giving her formula.  I also started pumping and that was equally discouraging as I was hardly producing anything, and I had no time to rest as I was constantly cleaning and disinfecting my equipment.

In my mind I was a failure. My nipples bled. I was tired exhausted. I was beginning to resent feeding this helpless little mini me. I was resenting being a mother and my PPD demons started growing. Still I persisted. I persisted until I just couldn’t anymore.

Deciding to bottle feed my child was a very humbling experience.

I had to put my pride deep in my pocket and do what was best for my mini me and for me (mentally).

You can see why I wanted to be part of the I SUPPORT YOU movement. I have been there. I have tried everything. I have walked in those uncomfortable tight shoes with 9 inch heels.

So dear mama who might happen on this post.

I support you! 

I support your decision to breastfeed and bottle feed.
I support your decision to tube and finger feed.
I support your decision to formula feed and to pump.
I support your decision to give cow’s milk, almond milk, soy and goat milk.
I support your right to breast feed in public and to bravely face the public while bottle feeding your baby.

Congratulations for taking whatever it takes to feed your baby. You are an excellent mom. You are doing a great job.

In the wise words of Sir Paul McCartney – We all stand together.

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CLICK TO PLAY

Win Or Lose, Sink Or Swim
One Thing Is Certain We’ll Never Give In
Side By Side, Hand In Hand
We All Stand Together

Play The Game, Fight The Fight
But What’s The Point On A Beautiful Night?
Arm In Arm, Hand In Hand
We All Stand Together

Keeping Us Warm In The Night
La La La La
Walk In The Night
You’ll Get It Right

Win Or Lose, Sink Or Swim
One Thing Is Certain We’ll Never Give In
Side By Side, Hand In Hand
We All Stand Together

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The way I are!

I am not a better mother than you are because of the way I do things,
I am a better mother to my child because of the way I do things!
DG

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I use disposable diapers,
because I don’t want to deal with anymore shit than I have to.
I formula fed (eventually),
because my child was hungry.
I rocked my baby to sleep,
because it’s the only way she would get to sleep.
I let my baby fall asleep on me,
because it’s the only way we slept.
I sleep with my husband and toddler,
because it’s the only way we get a decent night sleep.
I lie with my toddler before she falls sleep,
because I enjoy it (most nights).
I didn’t let my child cry it out,
because I could handle her crying.
I shout,
because sometimes a long explanation to a 2-year-old just won’t do.
I make a special meals at dinner time,
because sometimes my sanity is not worth the fight.
I allow brownies for dinner and cupcakes for breakfast,
because they contain 3 food groups.
I don’t always keep a tidy house,
because its not a priority for me.
I enjoyed going back to work (and didn’t feel guilty),
because being a SAHM would have driven me to drink.
I am a medicated mom,
because without them I would have been a raging mess.
I also vaccinate without thinking twice or googling the lengthy lists of possible reactions and side effects.

The decisions I make are not based on books, peer pressure or what the latest fad is.
They are not because I read them on a mommy board or asked for someones opinion, advise or approval.
They are merely whats right for my family and I.

I hope all moms can find comfort and peace with the decisions they make or have made.
Let them be yours.

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